On being speechless

I think I’ve mentioned before on this site that I’m a shy guy. If I haven’t mentioned that, or you simply haven’t read it, then you know now anyway. And, now knowing what you know, you’ll understand at least a little bit when I say that I have a problem with new people. That came out wrong. What I meant to say is that I’m afraid of the pained silences I always seem to have around new people.

For you’re reading pleasure, I’ve included a sample conversation. The names and occupations change, but the outcome is, if not entirely universal, at least par for the course.

Me: So Bob, what do you do for a living?
Bob: I’m a professional wrestler.
Me: Ah. You must meet some interesting people.
Bob: It’s a living.
Me: Right.
Bob: Yup.
Me: …
Bob: …
Me: So… uh….
Bob: Listen, I have to wash me hair or something. I’m going to go now.
Me: Hair care is important.
Bob: Right.

I live my life in constant fear of not having anything interesting to say. I guess that’s part of the appeal of this blog. I can say what I want to say. If you don’t find it interesting, you can just pass on by. There’s no reason to make up excuses, no need for bad lies about hair care. So, in a weird way, the impersonal nature of this site is what allows me to be personal to an extent. Everyone on the other side of this monitor is safely at arms length from me. Sometimes you stop by and say nice things about what I write, and I read some of what a few of you write, but on the whole, this is one way communication.

I wonder if people do that to God, that one way street approach. You see, because it’s one way communication, even personal communication, we don’t have to worry about rejection because we’re not asking for acceptance. We’re just shooting words off into the dark. I think a lot of us spend time talking about God so we don’t have to talk to Him. It’s easier. We don’t have to worry about what He’ll say to us if we never listen. Don’t have to worry about Him affecting us if we keep Him at arm’s length.

I wonder what would happen if we didn’t keep Him at arm’s length.

I think I spend too much time wondering.

Comments

jeff said…
If we didn't keep him at arm's length, our lives, as we know it, would be over.
Alastair said…
1) what you have to say is interesting
2) sometimes saying nothing is the best thing
3) hair care is important
4) there is no 4)
Tom said…
Yeah, I'm a big fan of hair care myself.