The astute reader will note that the two posts concerning my status as a youth leader at my church have been removed. The reason I did this is simple: their presence on a web site read by members of that youth group and members of my church was inappropriate. I posted them thinking, dumbly, that my blog was reasonably anonymous. The people that go to my church that I know read this blog were among the people I discussed the issues with personally. Except… I forgot that I gave my blog address to some members of my youth group.
That said, I want to make a few points clear.
1. The youth pastor in question in no way asked me to leave or required anything of me that caused me to leave. He was, and is, sad to see me go. My discussions with him have shown him to be a reasonable, God-fearing man with the best interests of the youth in mind. He’s earned my respect since coming here, and I look forward to seeing his vision for the youth group unfold. The youth of my church are blessed to have him.
2. The reason I left is sad and simple: I don’t feel I can offer the youth of my church the time they deserve. The youth of my church are amazing and deserve someone who can offer them reliability that I simply can’t. I know the timing looks suspicious, but all the youth pastor did was ask me to seriously think about my commitments. The choice was mine and mine alone.
3. I’m the reason I chose to leave. I know I just said that, but it’s important enough that it bears repeating. It has nothing to do with the new leadership. Once again, all the youth pastor did was ask me to think.
4. If you’re one of the people who reads my blog and knows me in person, please, please ask me if you have any questions. I don’t want miscommunication to cause any rift in the youth group.
I really can’t make up for the error I’ve made, but I’d like to offer an apology to all affected. To the youth pastor, I had no right to discuss internal issues in a public venue, even one I dumbly thought was anonymous. To the youth, you deserved to hear about my decision personally, not through a blog.
To those that took the time to provide insight when I asked a question, thank you. I’m sorry that your thoughts can’t be displayed here any longer. I hope you understand.
And now, I think I’m going to go hide in a hole for awhile. Hopefully, the next post will have nothing to do with any of this. It might even be funny. That’d be nice.
That said, I want to make a few points clear.
1. The youth pastor in question in no way asked me to leave or required anything of me that caused me to leave. He was, and is, sad to see me go. My discussions with him have shown him to be a reasonable, God-fearing man with the best interests of the youth in mind. He’s earned my respect since coming here, and I look forward to seeing his vision for the youth group unfold. The youth of my church are blessed to have him.
2. The reason I left is sad and simple: I don’t feel I can offer the youth of my church the time they deserve. The youth of my church are amazing and deserve someone who can offer them reliability that I simply can’t. I know the timing looks suspicious, but all the youth pastor did was ask me to seriously think about my commitments. The choice was mine and mine alone.
3. I’m the reason I chose to leave. I know I just said that, but it’s important enough that it bears repeating. It has nothing to do with the new leadership. Once again, all the youth pastor did was ask me to think.
4. If you’re one of the people who reads my blog and knows me in person, please, please ask me if you have any questions. I don’t want miscommunication to cause any rift in the youth group.
I really can’t make up for the error I’ve made, but I’d like to offer an apology to all affected. To the youth pastor, I had no right to discuss internal issues in a public venue, even one I dumbly thought was anonymous. To the youth, you deserved to hear about my decision personally, not through a blog.
To those that took the time to provide insight when I asked a question, thank you. I’m sorry that your thoughts can’t be displayed here any longer. I hope you understand.
And now, I think I’m going to go hide in a hole for awhile. Hopefully, the next post will have nothing to do with any of this. It might even be funny. That’d be nice.
Comments
Don't stay in the hole too long, a funny post is always appreciated...
I hate it when awkward things like that happen, but for what it's worth...your writing came off as very respectful and something that just needed to be thought out.
That's what blogs are for. It might not have been ideal that some in your church could literally read your mind, but I didn't feel it was anything to be ashamed of. It was simply weighing an issue that is obviously close to your heart.
I think it was some of the readers who had negatives to say about the church itself. When I read it, I could see the youth pastor's point, and like you...I felt like that would be a lot to take on for a young man in your shoes at this point in your life.
I hope that makes sense. I'm not a morning person. I've done things before that made me feel like crawling in a hole, but I really feel like you made an innocent mistake here. You weren't intentionally stirring the pot. You were just trying to figure out if being a part of the youth group still is where God wants you right now. That's noble...even if some people had access to your "out loud" thinking that you had forgotten about.
Hope you're feeling better! And I'm glad my ranting about weight loss got a laugh out of you. You are VERY lucky not to be a chick! :)
PS If people from your church are reading this...my display name isn't what it may sound like. It has nothing to do with anything perverse. :)
Thanks, Alastair and Girl (et al). A deciding factor in the removal of the posts was a call from a concerned parent. While it didn’t take me long to explain the situation, I couldn’t help but wonder how many people had read it, become concerned, and not called. I really do think it’s a bummer that I had to remove from public viewing the thoughts that other people took the time to share with me, but the simple fact that what was listed (both my words and those of others) had the potential to cause division in the youth far outweighed any motive I had for leaving the posts up. What I really don’t want is my last gift to the youth group to be strife.
And no, I don’t plan on ever adding any restrictions on who can comment on my blog. One of the coolest parts about this whole blogging thing is the interesting people you get to meet because they leave a comment while surfing through. I can’t really think of any other way I’d meet a motorcycle riding English minister or an underwear clad mother from a different state.
Off topic, I didn't remember that you a ddressed that letter to a chipped diamond. I've been on the topic of diamonds with some friends of mine, so it is interesting...
Thanks for sharing, as always.