Bodily functions and enduring love

[Author's note] My hiatus didn't work. For reasons both complex and mystifying, not blogging hasn't provided me with any more time to read. That said, I'm ending my hiatus early. Please feel free to mourn or rejoice as you feel appropriate. [End author's note]

Christians fart. I know, I know, that sounds like a horrible way to start. That's because it is a horrible way to start. But I've been going around and around trying to figure out how to broach this topic, and that's the best I could come up with. So I'll say it again.

Christians fart.

This post is not about bodily functions. This post is about real life. This post is about wrinkled clothes, tangled hair, five o'clock shadows, drinking, smoking, swearing, lying, cheating, gossiping, hurting, fornicating, committing adultery, bleeding, dying, and living. This post is about Christians.

There's a misconception out there that's been grating on me as of late. Somewhere along the line, society at large decided that Christians should be perfect. After all, aren't we transformed into the image of Christ when we're born again? And thus transformed, aren't we supposed to be freed from all sins? If so, man, oh man, did I join the wrong religion, wrong faith, wrong love for a God who demands all that.

Did Christ really say that the world will know we are Christians because of our perfection?

I'm going to tell you a secret, but you'll have to promise to keep it to yourself. Who knows what damage would be done to our reputations as Christians if this ever got out. Are you ready? The secret is this: Christians aren't perfect.

I'm going to pause a moment to give you time to pick your jaw off the floor (or to finish typing your angry rebuttal of my obvious heresy).

Oh, we pretend to be perfect. We go to church with our freshly pressed clothes, we say the right things, and talk to the right people. We dance to the tune the world thinks we should dance to. But it's all a lie. We're not perfect. We lie. We cheat. We gossip. We commit adultery. And we hide it all under a thin veneer of "Christian perfection."

Why is it that we're so shocked when we find that our leaders sin? Is it because we didn't think them capable of sin, or is it because seeing them sin so humiliatingly publicly makes it that much harder to believe our own lies?

Christ said that the world will know we are Christians by our love, not our perfection. Christians sin. But we also forgive. True Christianity is a faith based on forgiveness drenched in an incomprehensible love. Read any quality Christian author and you'll find words written not from the pulpit but from the dirt.* There is a profound sense of humility that flows from the words of our saints. Living with the full knowledge that they are not perfect, that they are saved from their sins by the love of Christ, how could they write with anything other than humility?

Does all this mean that the transforming power of Christ is really just so much talk? Does this mean that we're doomed to live as we lived before Christ? No. The love of Christ transforms you. It stretches the bounds of your soul. There's a cliche that says that forgiveness is divine. I agree with that. The act of forgiveness takes the touch of the divine in you, takes the Christ in you. Could you forgive before you were a Christian as you do now? Would your love stretch wide enough?

Because it was a bad way to start, I want to end the same way.

Christians fart. Will you love us anyway?


*A note on Christian authors: Please do yourself a favor and avoid any Christian author who claims to be perfect and wants to share his/her secret for perfection with you. If you want to read a book like that, go to the secular self-help section. At least then you won't have to deal with the hypocrisy.

Comments

David said…
Nice post. I was thinking of posting a similar sentiment last night on my own blog. I didn't but I thought about it. Among my dear prisoner students there are those who use that excuse. "If Christ was real he would force everyone to be good" or some such nonsense that makes themselves feel better about not believing in Christ.
jeff said…
Glad to have you back Tom. And, as for this post, speak for yourself. I have perfect farts every time.
What an outstanding post! I needed to hear that Christians fart. Of course, I don't. At least Ironman thinks I don't, but that's another story.

I also came over to say two things.

1. I HATE that you don't have an email address attached to your blog. Of all the comments I get on my blog, your comments are the main ones I want to respond to, but can't. At least not without dragging the topic over here. Mostly all I would type would be "haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!" but at least I'd get it out of my system.

2. One of my readers said you look like Kenny Chesney in your cowboy hat. But after examining it, I don't think it's a cowboy hat anymore. Is it? Anyway, if you're ears are burning, it's because people at my blog are talking about you.

3. From what I understand, Christians also poop. I think there's even been a book written about it.
Anonymous said…
Dude,

Nicely posted. I do hate the sin, and struggle with what is sin and what is just bad form part of life. On that note, I liked it, but I felt I wanted to go for a bit of a pipe smoke after reading it. I see this as a trend with almost all the Christian insperational writing that I read.

Oh, and also, if said Christians have to much buckwheat pancakes the farting could turn drastically south.
Tom said…
David,

Yeah, I've never much like the "if God exists than the world would be perfect" argument. Mainly, I oppose it on the grounds that God does exists and the world isn't perfect.

Jeff,

Can you have a perfect fart? Does that even make sense?

F&D,

1. I'll see what I can do about getting my email address attached to my blog. It may take a bit as computers and I have a love why-won't-you-work-you-horrible-box sort of relationship.

2. Nope, not a cowboy hat. It's kind of an Australian outbackish hat. I think. I don't really wear it all that often, but I like the pic and the rest is history.

2.1 Is it wrong that I don't know who Kenney Chesney is?

2.2 I hope most of the ear-burning talk is good. If it isn't, you should lie and say it's good anyway.

3. I need to read this Christian pooping book. Sounds exactly like the sort of deep theology I could get into.

Fowler,

Thanks, dude. And yeah, buckwheat pancakes have been clinically proven to make things go bad down south.
Here I am coming ALL the way over here to say:

1. Get G-mail. It's easy and the best thing since sliced bread.

2. You're not skinny like I'm talking skinny. You clearly have muscles. My prom date was silly putty stretched over a tall skeleton.

3. It's not wrong that you don't know who Kenny Chesney is...hard to believe, but not wrong. Kenny is only one of the most famous country stars out there right now. Here's his pic. His music rocks and he's a hottie, so it's good to be compared to him. The ear burning would be good.

http://www.dance-lyrics.com/ama/no_shoes_no_shirt_no_problems_b000063tds.jpg
MM said…
I will echo F & D. Outstanding post, especially as related to farts- good example.

I've been struggling with these questions. Needed the sermon, Pastor.